Total Drama Spies
by District 715
Summary: Finally... FINALLY! It took me forever to get on here...
1. Total Drama Spies!

(Ryan's playing video games. A hand comes from behind him and grabs him.)

Ryan : Hey-mmmmph!

(Madison A. is walking along when a rope trap snares her and she's tied up.)

Madison: Hey, what's going on?

(Nathan turns the corner)

Nathan: Madison?

(Someone hits him upside the head with a baseball 're both thrown in the back of a truck by men in black.)

(Elizabeth is listening to music when a guy attacks her with a pair of nunchucks. There's a scuffle, and Elizabeth ends up with the nunchucks. Four other men pin her to the ground and bind her.)

(Avery and Florence are making out on a couch. They don't notice as men in black cart the couch into a truck.)

(Four trucks drive up to a hidden shed deep in the mountains.)

(Everyone walks out of the trucks. There's a man monitoring some computer screens.)

Mysterious Man: Welcome. We need you for some missions. All our other agents were either defeated or switched sides, and we're scraping the bottom of the barrel for replacements.

(Man turns around. It's Chris!)

Chris: Are you ready?

(Confused murmuring)

Chris: Since we only have six spies, we need some more. Send in some campers!

**Application Form:**

**Name (First and Last)- **

**Nickname (if any)- **

**Gender-**

**Age-**

**Stereotype-**

**Appearance:**

**Hair (style and colour)- **

**Eyes-**

**Skin Tone- **

**Height-**

**Weight-**

**Build-**

**Other (Birthmarks, Freckles, Piercing, Tattoos, etc)-**

**Clothes:**

**Everyday-**

**Swimwear-**

**Party Clothes (not formal)-**

**Pjs-**

**Accessories-**

**Personality-**

**Treatment to campers when they first arrive-**

**What is she/he like around friends?-**

**What is she/he like around people they don't like?-**

**Like-**

**Dislikes-**

**Weak points-**

**Strong points-**

**Talents-**

**Phobia (s)-**

**Why are they scared of this?-**

**Paired up?-**

**If yes with who-**

**Will they be in romantic denial?-**

**How do they flirt?-**

**Past-**

**Family and friends (will be using it for message from home to the final five)-**

**Medical conditions-**

**Challenge request/suggestion-**

**Audition tape (don't have to do this but it gives you a better chance of getting in)-**

Chris: Send in those people.

Ryan: What's going on?

Chris: Can't tell you that. All I can tell you is that this is

Total

Drama

Spies!


	2. Spies Come Forth

(Chris looks at the computer screens.)

Chris: This is kinda sad.(Turns to face the camera.) As hard as this is to say, we're gonna have to cut some of the applicants from the show. Oh, just so you know, Jay, you are not coming back...

Jay: What? I just got here.

Chris: Fine. You can stay as an intern.

(Back to screen)

Chris: There seems to be a SEVERE lack of boys. There has been only two male applicants, and one of them is Jay here. We nedd one more guy before we can start. Send in those reviews!


	3. Agent X

(Chris sits at a computer screen)

Chris: Welcome back to Total Drama Spies. Last week we introduced the top six runner-ups from last year. Today we're going to introduce the final four **(Sorry if you didn't get accepted.)** contestants before giving them their mission. Our first person up…

(Car comes up with a brown-haired guy with blue eyes. He's got a good build and he's pretty tall.)  
Chris-Hello Muskoka. How ya doing?

Muskoka: Yo, Chris. Do I get my check now or after the show?

Chris: Uh, you have to _win_ it first. Is that too hard for you to understand?

Muskoka: (Glares at Chris, turns to campers) Greetings, people. I'm Valentinez Alkalinella, Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser I, don't hesitate to call. If that's too long for you all I guess you can call me Sam.

Chris: (Forced smile): Alright! Next contestant coming right up.

(Car pulls up and a handsome guy jumps out)

Ron: Hi!

Chris: This is Ronald James.

Ron: I don't need the million dollars, but it'll add another 50% to my bank account. I wouldn't expect any of you to know that kind of money.

Ryan: Excuse me? I have a bank account, too, O Great Conceited One.

(Ron and Ryan glare it out for five seconds until another girl pulls up.)

Gail: Hi! Is this Total Drama Spies?

Chris (Acts like bad guy): What's it to you? (Changes back) (laughs) Yep. Hope you packed your overnight bag, 'cause you're staying for a very long time.

(Gail has long light brown hair, blue eyes, and is very attractive.)

Gail: Hi, guys. I'm Gail.

Sam: Hi. I'm Wind.

Gail: Do you have something against my name?

Sam: What makes you say that? For all I know, your dad might be a meteorologist.

Gail: At least he's not your father. He would be too ashamed to admit it.

Sam: Yeah. The other people would wonder if I had a thirty-point IQ like you. Then again, I would be the brains of the family.

Gail: At least I _have_ a brain! (Smiles in triumph)

Sam (whispers): Well, at least I have a 'Y' chromosome.

(Gail glares at him, thinking.)

Gail: Well, at least I don't need one.

(Chris winces and dramatic music plays. Gail and Sam are having a stand-off.)

(Sam's face admits defeat.)

Sam: You got me there. (Holds out hand) Nice job.

(Gail slowly slips her hand into his. A joy buzzer jolts her.)

Gail (brings hand back): Gah!

(Sam Laughs)

Sam: That was good verbal jousting, though. Try again later.

(Another car pulls up)

Chris: Our last contestant…

(Jess jumps off the top, does a trick, then crash-lands on Chris.)

Jess: Sorry!

Chris: Come on! I just got a manicure. Guys, this is Jess.

Jess: Master skateboarder and an awesome partygoer!

Chris: (Gets up and brushes himself off.) Let me warn you. Being a spy isn't all champagne and fancy gadgets. You don't get a license to kill. In fact, to a spy, the best job is one that never happens, if you get my drift. As far as everyone is concerned, you don't even exist. Get it?

Elizabeth: Got it.

Chris: Good. Now, it's time for your briefing. (He pulls out a file.) We are part of a very powerful-

(Chris is interrupted by smashing glass.)

(Everyone looks up to a ninja-like secret agent coming down on a rope: A male clad in black. His face is covered by a visor.)

Chris: It's Agent X!

(Agent X drops some smoke grenades, blinding the contestants. He grabs some files. Then he grabs a helicopter ladder, and starts climbing. The helicopter lifts away, and the smoke clears.)

Chris: Those were important files. Your first task will to be to recover them. But for now, you have to wait until the next episode of

Total

Drama

Spies!


	4. Spies in our Midst

(Backstage, an intern is moving boxes. He picks up a box and he sees a girl hiding behind it.)

Intern: Aren't you that girl from last season? The one all the guys wanted?

Raquel: Don't tell Chris! Please!

Intern: And why not?

Raquel: I'm hiding from my ex-husband.

Intern: I don't believe you. You marry at that age?

Raquel: I'm a Royal from India.

Intern: Riiight... Chris! (hits emergency button)

(Chris with campers)

Chris: Aha! Your first challenge! An enemy spy has been person with the most hits on him or her in five minutes wins. We'll be able to tell who wins by the different colored paintballs. GO! Go go go go go go go go go go!

(Campers pick up paintball guns)

**(4:45 seconds left)**

(Raquel is hiding behind a box.)

Ryan: I don't see the spy anywhere. If only Paul were here. He would have found the spy quick as lightning.

Jess: Paul? Who's Paul?

(Raquel starts listening intently.)

**(Interogation room)**

Paul: I'm closer than you think, guys. (laughs)

**(End Interogation room)**

**(3:30 seconds left)**

Ryan: Wow. She doesn't know who Paul is.

Jess: What's the problem? Was he the big guy at camp?

Nathan: Heck yes. He won the million dollars.

(Raquel gasps)

Ryan: There! The spy!

(Raquel runs)

Elizabeth: Raquel?-Get her!

(Campers shoot at her)

(Raquel runs toward a cliff.)

(Elizabeth hits her. She stumbles and falls off.)

Chris: Ouch. Well, the trespassing penalties should cover her medical bills.

(A helicopter with a rope ladder comes up with Agent X holding Raquel.)

Chris: That was unexpected.

(The helicopter flies off.)

Chris: Will we figure out who Agent X is? Why was Raquel on-set? Will we _ever_ get on with this? Find out the answers to this and more on our next episode of

Total

Drama

Spies!


	5. Spretchen Ze Deutch?

(Chris at the computer screens)

Chris: Today, we're going to really start up this show. The contestants don't know this, but in order to get the plans, they have to complete eight missions from all around the world. Some missions may seem easy, may seem simple, but they're really very complicated. Today's mission takes place in Germany. We don't actually have the money to travel to Germany, but the interns are _really_good at decorating. So put on your trench coats and tune in to today's episode of

Total

Drama

Spies!

( Plays theme song)

Hi Mom and Dad I'm doing fine

You guys are on my mind

You asked me what I wanted to be

And now I think the answer is plain to see

I wanna be famous!

I wanna live close to the sun

So pack your bags cause I've already won

I'm coming up, nothing in my way

I'll get there one day

'Cause I wanna be famous!

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous! (same as last)

(whistling beat)

(Chris with 'secret agents')

Chris: It's time to give you your spy gear.

(Campers cheer)

Chris: I'm gonna warn you, some of the spy gear may be dangerous. We're not responsible for any injuries that could occur. Agreed?

Campers (In-sync): Agreed.

(Chris pulls back sheet on table)

(Campers gasp)

Ryan:(Picks up tool) It's just a laser pointer and a backpack.

Jess: Maybe it's transformable!

Chris: These.... are just laser pointers and backpacks. Seriously. We couldn't afford laser cutters and jet packs for you guys.

**(Interog Room)**

Nathan: Darn. I was really hoping that we got some actual spy gear.

**(End Interog Room)**

Chris: Oh, you'll get actual spy gear. You can pick up anything you find and use it. Spies had to learn to think on their feet. Also, after each mission, you'll get a tool you can use on later missions. The closer to first place you are, the better the prize. Comprende?

(Muttered acceptance)

Chris: Today you'll be going to a nation which a lot of people from WWII called 'The Motherland'. Not all of the people from this nation were on the same side.(Pulls back curtain to show a semi-modern street.) Welcome to Germany, about 1940. Contrary to popular belief, Germans were not bad themselves. The Nazis who converted some of them were. The Nazis took over most of Germany, but there was a continuous resistance against them until the end of the war. You are part of this resistance. This is not a true case file. However, you should act as if it was real. There is also a time-traveling enemy agent looking for the best position to catch you. We've named him Agent X. He will try to capture you guys. Eventually he will succeed. You've got to be on the lookout for him. He could be anyone. _ANYONE_.

(Campers look around nervously.)

Chris: ...but don't let that put a twist in your toga. Go to 43rd street, into the second dark alley to the right, and look in the trash cans. There you will find your next tool. Two men, both in red coats, will meet on the street about five minutes after you get there. Take in every word of their conversation. Then find me. I'll be wearing a black winter jacket and be complaining loudly about how cold it is here.

Madison: Like you always do.

Chris: Anyways, get going. I'll meet you in ten minutes.

(Campers run to challenge)

(Chris smiles and pulls out a com link.)

Chris: Agent X?

Agent X: Yes?

Chris: They're away.

Agent X: Excellent. Plan Alpha commencing.

Chris: Good. (Closes com link, turns to camera) I know what you're thinking. I'm not going to answer that yet.

(Cut to Agent X's hideout)

(Agent X is preparing a paintball gun, and Raquel is looking around.)

Raquel: Who are you?

Agent X: I should probably be asking you that, _Raquel_.

Raquel: How do you know my name?

Agent X: I know a lot of things. I was a real fan of the last show you were in- even when you got kicked off.

Raquel: I was robbed. Anyway, my husband is a bad man.

Agent X: Yes, I know that you're a Royal, blah blah blah, you were engaged, yadda yadda yadda. Big deal.

Raquel: You certainly keep yourself up to date.

(A screen beeps)

(Back to challenge)

Ron: What are these? (Pulls clothes out of trash can)

Jess: They're disguises! Cool! I have a old lady outfit!

(Campers changed)

(Jess is an old lady sitting on a bench. Ron is a man in fancy clothes, Gail and Sam are two teens on a date, and the others are hobos and shoppers.)

Gail: This is so embarrassing!

Sam: You're not kidding. This is ridiculous. I'm on a date with you.

Gail: At least you're on a date with a decent-looking girl.

Sam (grins): Who said anything about that? You seem to like this.

Gail (Blushes): Speak for yourself.

Sam: I am speaking for myself. I'm speaking the truth.

(Gail lightly punches him)

Sam: See! You're flirting!

Gail: Ugh! (Slaps him and walks out)

Sam: What did you do that for?

(Two men IN RED walk up. The campers listen.)

Man#1: Did you hear about Lieutenant Johnson?

Man#2: Yes! I hear he got his command revoked for insubordination. They're holding him in the military prison.

Man#1: Cell 312465, as I hear.

Man#2: You have a good memory!

Man#1: Thank you! See you later.

Man#2: You, too.

(They walk away.)

(Sam follows Gail down the street. They pretend he's trying to bring her back to the Cafe as they listen for Chris.)

Sam: Julie! Come on!

Gail: No way, Marcus! You're such a jerk!

Chris: Brrr! It's so cold in Germany! I just come, and I'm about to freeze to death.

Bartender: Aw, shut yer mouth! If yer so cold, why don't ya leave and give us some peace?

Chris: I'm waiting for my mother. She's so dainty, I don't know how she survives in this cold.

(Jess walks in. She sees Chris.)

Jess: Christopher! Come to your momma!

(Bar residents laugh)

Chris: Hi, mom. (He hugs Jess)

Jess: You're starving to death! Momma's gonna fix you up some dumplings!

Chris: Momma! Please!

Jess (whisper):We found them.

Chris (Whisper): Good! Let's go!

(Prison)

Chris: You must break Lt. Johnson out of prison. You have paintball rifles, paint grenades, lock picking kits, and shovels. Word of advice: Nazis are suspicious of most people that don't have blond hair and blue eyes. Also, I don't want you massacring all the prison guards. Think Indiana Jones. You blow up a truck full of Germans, you gain some reputation points. You don't want those points until after the war. (Hands out maps) A nice gentleman has lifted the blueprints for the cells. Find Johnson, free him, get out of there. I'm gonna split you up into two teams. Ryan, Ron, (The two glare at each other) Madison, Elizabeth, and Nathan, you're team Beta. The rest of you: Avery, Florence, Sam, Gail, and Jess, you're team Delta. By the way- Watch out for Agent X. He could be anywhere... ANYWHERE. (Looks Sam dead in the eye with a suspicious look)

**(Interog Room)**

Elizabeth: I feel that Chris knows more than he's telling us.

**(Pause Interog Room, cut to film booth)**

Chris: Yeah... They figure stuff out quick. Notice that this is live and I'm in here-(laughs) They're in for more than they expect.

**(Back to the challenge)**

(Ron sneaks past a guard and hits him over the head with a board. He collapses to the ground. Ron puts on the guard's uniform and motions for Ryan, Nathan, Madison, and Elizabeth to follow him. )

(Jess guides Team Delta through the air conditioner. There's a squeak, but no one hears it.)

(Ron distrcts a door guard with a conversation as the others sneak past.)

(Jess, Avery, Sam, and Gail climb out of the air conditioner.)

Avery: Where's Florence?

**(Film Booth)**

Chris: Yeaahhh... I forgot to mention that there will be no voting elimination except for the last challenge. The spies will be picked off one by one by Agent X until there are only two left. The remaining two will attempt to defeat Agent X and free the captured campers. Oops.

**(Back to Challenge) **

(Ryan runs into the inprisonment level. He checks the map and looks up. There's a scrawny man shivering under the rags he uses for sheets.)

Ryan: Lt. Johnson?

Johnson: Not anymore. Those darn Nazis took me out of a job.

Ryan: Hold on. We'll get you out. Guys!

(Team Beta runs in.)

(Team Delta runs in.)

(Cut to Jess sticking a paint grenade under the door.)

Ryan: Stand back!

(Grenade explodes, freeing Johnson and setting off an alarm.)

Johnson: This way!

(They run from Nazis, Johnson showing them through nooks and crannies not on the blueprints.)

Jess: How do you know all these passageways?

Johnson: I used to be a soldier myself! Let's move!

(They all run out of the prison. Johnson hops in an Allied spy vehicle and races away.)

Chris: Thanks to you, we've added a valuable person to our ranks. The Nazis will be defeated in no time.

Avery: Yeah, but we've lost one. Where's Flo?

(A voice recorder tied to a remote-control vehicle drives up.)

Voice: _I am Agent X. You will not see your fellow agent again._

Avery: Nooooo!!! Not Florence! Why didn't you take Ron?

(Ron looks offended)

(Avery breaks down crying)

Chris: Will Agent X be stopped? Will Avery get over this loss? Will I get somewhere warm and cozy? Find out next time on

Total

Drama

Spies!


	6. Tazers!

Chris: Last time on Total Drama Spies!

**(Flashback)**

_We showed our contestants how to live in the German world for a while as Team Beta and Team Delta freed a friendly spy from the grips of the Nazis. However, it turns out that Agent X was right on their tail, and had nabbed one of our contestants._

**(End Flashback)**

Chris: Strap on that jetpack and get ready for the next episode of

Total

Drama

Spies!

( Plays theme song)

Hi Mom and Dad I'm doing fine

You guys are on my mind

You asked me what I wanted to be

And now I think the answer is plain to see

I wanna be famous!

I wanna live close to the sun

So pack your bags cause I've already won

I'm coming up, nothing in my way

I'll get there one day

'Cause I wanna be famous!

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous! (same as last)

(whistling beat)

(HQ)

Chris: I promised you awesome spy gear, and you're going to get awesome spy gear. Say hello to your new-(pulls off blanket) mini-tazers!

(Confusion from campers)

Sam: Aren't those supposed to be dangerous?

Chris: Aren't jetpacks supposed to be dangerous?

Sam: Fair point.

Chris: See, you just press this little button and-

(Tazer fires an electric bolt and hits Ryan)

Ryan: Auugh!

(Ryan collapses)

Chris: We'll be right back after this guy wakes up.


	7. Laser Tag or a Dangerous Plot?

(Ryan is carried off in an ambulance)

Chris: We seem to have lost a camper. I suppose Agent X won't have to capture anyone today.

(Campers whispering among themselves)

Chris: Uh, I wasn't expecting to give out a free day so early, so….. I guess that means it's time for laser tag!

(Campers cheer)

Chris: Or –after I fix the power level on these tazers- Tazer tag!

(Crickets chirping)

Chris: Laser tag it is, then. Ron, Sam, Elizabeth, and Gail, you're Red team. Jess, Madison A, Avery, and Nathan, you're Blue team.

(Teams ready for laser tag)

Jess: You're going down!

Elizabeth: That's what you think! Let's go, Red team!

Chris: Ready, set, TAG!

(Electronic zapping)

Ron: I'm hit!

Elizabeth: I'll cover you! Get back to base.

(Ron runs for it.)

(Jess gets hit twice)

Jess: Doggone it!

Sam: Gotcha! Go Red team!

Gail: Stop showing off.

Sam: What? Afraid of getting impressed?

Gail: No. I'm afraid of hooking you.

Sam: Too late.

Ron: Hey! Stop flirting and start shooting!

(Gail glares at Sam. He grins sheepishly.)

(Blue team base)

Avery: You guys go around the back and… ahh, I can't do this.

Nathan: What's wrong?

Avery: I just keep thinking about Flo. I just wish I could find her.

Madison A.: So keep going until you get captured or you can rescue her.

Nathan: Yeah. Stick with it and on the final challenge, win and free her. That'll impress her beyond belief.

Avery: Thanks! Alright! Let's come around the back and ambush them!

(Chris at lever)

Chris (Megaphone): Smokescreen! (Laughs)

(Smoke fills the hall)

(Electric zapping sounds)

(Chris looks at his watch)

Chris: Time's up! Check out your score cards!

(Campers come out)

Jess: What's your score card say?

Ron: I tagged Avery 12 times, Nathan three, you 20 times, Madison A. 4 times, and Agent X once-

Gail: -Wait. Agent X? You tagged Agent X?

Sam: Wait a minute- Where's Elizabeth? WHERE'S ELIZABETH?

**(Interrogation Room)**

Gail: I never felt more helpless. A mad enemy agent nabbing us one by one, never knowing if you're going to be snatched next… The fear is overwhelming.

**(End Interrogation Room)**

Chris: I have good news! Ryan is back in the game! He isn't going to sue us, but to make a long story short; I had to pay dearly for it.

**(Cut to hospital room)**

Chris: (juggling tazers) Ryan! How much longer do I have to keep this up?

Ryan (With camera): Keep going…

**(Challenge)**

Chris: There are two score cards no one picked up. One is Elizabeth's and the other- (pales) –the other proves that we are under close surveillance. Where's – oh. (Turns to camera) Will we ever catch Agent X? Who be his next victim? Will Ryan stick to his promise? Find out next time on

Total

Drama

Spies!


	8. Casadrama

(Chris is looking at a computer screen. He turns around.)

Chris: Welcome back to Total Drama Spies. Today we're imitating one of the greatest spy movies of all time: Casablanca. Though it's not known for being a spy movie, it is considered the finest movie ever made. See what happens next on

Total

Drama

Spies!

( Plays theme song)

Hi Mom and Dad I'm doing fine

You guys are on my mind

You asked me what I wanted to be

And now I think the answer is plain to see

I wanna be famous!

I wanna live close to the sun

So pack your bags 'cause I've already won

I'm coming up, nothing in my way

I'll get there one day

'Cause I wanna be famous!

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous! (same as last)

(whistling beat)

Say hello to our remaining spies:

Jess,

Ron,

Gail,

Sam,

Avery,

Madison A,

Nathan,

and Ryan. So, are you guys ready for your next assignment?

(Campers cheer)

Chris: Here's the lowdown: The Nazis are onto you guys. You're somewhere in the Middle East, but we need you out of there pronto. We've got plane tickets, but Agent X knows he can grab one of you guys and steal a ticket aboard.

(Campers gasp)

Chris: You guys have got to disguise yourselves, rally the remaining French people here to resist the Nazis, and then get on the plane with the resistance before the Nazis arrive. Make sure you don't lose your tickets. Anyone who doesn't get on the plane in time will be eliminated. Got it?

(Nods all around)

Chris: So GO! Go, go, go, go, go, GO!

(Campers run to disguise chest.)

(All of the campers are in semiformal clothes.)

Ron: I feel much better now. It's superior to a T-shirt and shorts.

(Gail, Jess and Sam stare at him in disbelief.)

Sam: Okay… Guys, we've got to team up!

Ron: You're on your own. (Walks away)

Gail: If we split up, we'll be picked off!

(Ron doesn't listen and disappears.)

Ryan: Gail, Sam?

Gail: Yeah?

Ryan: Alliance?

(Gail and Sam look at each other.)

Sam: Done.

(Cut to Ron in a bar with Frenchmen)

Ron: You've got to believe me!

Frenchman: This guy's another Nazi spy! Get him!

(Frenchmen attack him. A Green Police officer runs in and sees the situation.)

Officer: Whadda you doing? He's a respected officer!

Bartender: I think you Green Officers are a bunch of dim-witted knuckleheads with badges.

French laypeople: Yeah! Viva La France!

Green Policeman: Stop! Stop in the name of the law!

(Frenchmen swarm the policeman. The other agents hear the commotion and run in.)

Gail: Viva La France!

Frenchmen: (Chant) La France! La France! La France! La France! La France! La France!

(Green policemen come in, but are swallowed up by the mob.)

Sam: That was fast. Now to get on the plane.

(They run to the airport. Agent X runs after them. As they reach the plane entrance, he trips up Gail.

Agent X: Oh, no, you don't!

Sam: Oh, yes, she does! (Knocks down Agent X and pulls Gail in the plane. The airplane gate closes just before Agent X gets in.)

Chris: A complete success! Let's see who's still here:

Madison A,

Gail,

Nathan,

Jess,

Ryan,

Sam,

and Avery. Ron has been taken by the enemy agents. Good job to the rest of you, though. You've earned special sound radars that help you hear faraway things.

(Campers cheer)

Chris: See you next time on

Total

Drama

Spies!

(Campers walk away)

(Chris grins evilly.)

Chris (Walkie-talkie): They fell for it. Stand by.

(Cut to Agent X base)

(Raquel and a tied-up Chris are looking at the cameras.)

Raquel: You have to admit, the disguise is very clever.

Chris: You'll never get away with this.

Raquel: They always say that, and we always do.


	9. Indiana Jones? HA!

(Chris is talking to a computer screen)

Chris: We have them all fooled. Stand by.

Mysterious Voice: Excellent…

( Plays theme song)

Hi Mom and Dad I'm doing fine

You guys are on my mind

You asked me what I wanted to be

And now I think the answer is plain to see

I wanna be famous!

I wanna live close to the sun

So pack your bags 'cause I've already won

I'm coming up, nothing in my way

I'll get there one day

'Cause I wanna be famous!

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous! (Same as last)

(Whistling beat)

(Campers)

Chris: Today, we'll take a trip to Bolivia, where you'll be somebody you never thought was a spy. Your goal: defeat the Nazis and take back the stolen Book of Secrets from them. They need the combo to get it open, because it's stuck in an indestructible black box, and there are about five thousand possible combos. Good luck.

Gail: Why do I think I know the guy in question?

(On plane)

Chris: We're about to land! Bolivia here we-

(Machine guns burst out above them. The plane starts going down.)

Chris:-come! (Unstraps himself.) Oh, by the way, I'm taking the last parachute. (Laughs)

Sam: Wait a minute! How are we supposed to survive? We don't have any parachutes.

Chris: James Bond never needed a parachute.

Sam: Yes, he did! He used one in-

Chris: Ah-ah-ah! I didn't say he never _used_ a parachute. I said he never _needed_ a parachute! (Laughs again)

(Chris jumps out and hits a palm tree)

Chris: Ow. I'm a reality TV show host, not a stuntman. _Medic!_

(Cut to Agent X hideout.)

Agent X: Admit it. He's your spitting image.

Chris: He's pretty good. But he's not as good as (Slow-mo) Chris… McClain. (Shiny teeth thing)

Raquel: Yeah, right. Good luck with that.

(Back to the campers. All scream as the plane hits. Chris walks in with a limp.)

Chris: Here we are in beautiful Bolivia. (Puts on fedora) Welcome to the world of Indiana Jones, 1952-ish.

(Campers crawl out of plane.)

Avery: _Indiana Jones?_ He was a _spy_? For which side?

Chris: Our side. The Germans were stealing priceless artifacts and trying to bend them to their will. That's where the story begins. You're going to get your stuff early…

(Sam is slumped over some wreckage. Gail runs over.)

Gail: Oh-my-***! Are you okay? (She cradles him in her arms. Sam smiles weakly.)

Sam: Now I am.

(Swelling music. Their lips move toward each other's-)

Chris: **A-HEM!**

(They blush and stand up.)

Chris: as I was SAYING, you guys are going to get bullwhips and fedoras. ( He holds them up.) Go into the Dark Tunnel of Doom-

Avery: Charming.

Chris (hacked): -DARK TUNNEL OF DOOM, and retrieve the Wanawaka Idol of Awesomeness. –_Geez, you guys interrupt so much-_ Any questions?

Ryan: One.

Chris: Yeah?

Ryan: What happens if one of us- y'know, doesn't survive, falls into a pit, etc.?

Chris: We sell all your stuff on Ebay. More money for me!

**(Interrogation Room)**

Ryan: That would be one **** of an end of year bonus if I died.

**(End Interrogation Room)**

Chris: The natives are after you! Better run!

(The campers run in.)

(Sam and Gail are together. She steps on a brick and it crumbles beneath her. Sam snatches her out of the way. They look at each other and kiss.)

(Cut to the campers on a computer screen)

(Agent X hideout)

Agent X: Maybe we should give our campers a little surprise. (Pulls lever)

(Camera cuts back to campers. The ground shakes, and the ceiling collapses.)

Avery: What the-RUN!

(Campers scream and run.)

Nathan: This way!

(Campers run into a separate room, and the other room collapses.)

(Shine comes from the inside of the room. Campers turn to see the scene from Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark.)

Ryan: I've got this. (He jumps onto a complicated series of bricks to reach the idol. It looks like Chris' head.) Figures- (He falls through a hole.) Aaaaauugggghhhhh!!!!!! (The idol clatters to the ground. It starts shaking, and a boulder rolls out of the idol stand.

Madison A: I've got the idol! (Grabs it and runs)

(Campers run for the clearly marked exit. They run through a doorway, and the boulder gets blocked. Madison A nearly falls into a pit.)

Chris (On loudspeaker): Better remember what to do. (Laughs) Those doors won't stay closed forever!

(Doors slowly slide down.)

Avery: Single file line!

(Contestants shove for position. One shoulder hits a brick, which triggers a bridge.)

Chris: Yeaaaaaahhhh… That was our backup…

(Contestants run out to be surrounded by Chris and fifty other guys.)

Chris: Hand it over, bubs.

(Madison A hands it over.)

Chris: See what happens next time on

Total

Drama

Spies!


	10. Book of Secrets: Part One

**Book of secrets: Part One**

**Flashback (Just to hack The One Called Demetra off) ;-)**

(Campers run for the clearly marked exit. They run through a doorway, and the boulder gets blocked. Madison A nearly falls into a pit.)

Chris (On loudspeaker): Better remember what to do. (Laughs) Those doors won't stay closed forever!

(Doors slowly slide down.)

Avery: Single file line!

(Contestants shove for position. One shoulder hits a brick, which triggers a bridge.)

Chris: Yeaaaaaahhhh… That was our backup…

(Contestants run out to be surrounded by Chris and fifty other guys.)

Chris: Hand it over, bubs.

(Madison A hands it over.)

**End Flashback**

Chris: Will competitors be defeated? Will the Nazis steal the Book of Secrets? Find out next on

Total

Drama

Spies!

( Plays theme song)

Hi Mom and Dad I'm doing fine

You guys are on my mind

You asked me what I wanted to be

And now I think the answer is plain to see

I wanna be famous!

I wanna live close to the sun

So pack your bags 'cause I've already won

I'm coming up, nothing in my way

I'll get there one day

'Cause I wanna be famous!

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

Nah nah nah nah nah nah nahnah nahnah

I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous! (Same as last)

(Whistling beat)

(Chris at computer screen)

Chris: The Germans should catch up with them in a second.

(Back to campers)

Avery: Heyyy… Did anyone notice someone missing?

Madison: (gasps) OMG. There are only four of us left. Sam, Gail, and Ryan got lost in the catacombs!

(Back to Chris)

Chris: Less money spent on production time means better ratings and fewer episodes… ergo… more money for me! I love this job.

(Campers)

Jess: What do we do? What do we do?

Nathan: The best thing we can do right now is to go on. Maybe we can rescue them later.

(They grab a plane to 'Germany'…)

(Agent X peeks out from behind a magazine)

(…and someone follows them.)

(They get off the plane.)

Madison: So now what?

Avery: I suppose we have to look for the Book of Secrets.

Madison: And how would we do that?

Nathan: By reading the newspaper! (Holds up German newspaper)

Jess (narrates): The German Intelligence Agency have captured one of the most important books in all of American history. They are going to show it off today at the Hitler Center.

Madison: Then what are we waiting for? (Runs off)

(Campers run after her)

(They walk up to the Hitler Center. Hitler opens the chest and holds up the Book triumphantly. The crowd screams- as Agent X drop down and grabs it.)

Avery: Darn. Now we've got to get the Book from _him?_

(Agent X runs into a casino. The campers follow him.)

Nathan: Hand that over, you thief!

(Fifty patrons of the bar stand up with machine guns. They surround the campers.)

Agent X: You're coming with me. You have a lot of info to spill.

**Intermisson**


	11. Book of Secrets: Part Two

(Cut to interrogation room)

Agent X: Name?

Madison A.: Madison.

Agent X: Tell me everything you know about Chris's plans.

Madison A: Absolutely nothing.

Agent X: Don't lie to me…

Madison A: I'm not lying!

Agent X: (To guard) Take her away.

Guard: Yes, Sir. (He takes away Madison A.)

Agent X: Nathan.

(Nathan is pushed in and sat down.)

Agent X: What do you know about Chris's plans?

Nathan: He wants us to get the President's Book of Secrets so that the Nazis don't get it.

Agent X: What made you think that I was actually teaming up with them?

Nathan: ...

Agent X: I'm waiting…

Nathan: Umm… You're kind of the bad guy.

Agent X: Bad guy, eh? (Thinks)

Nathan: ...can I leave now?

Agent X: You know what? I think I'm going to lock you all up in a room and leave for two hours. You have one shot at escaping. Don't screw it up. (Walks out and slams the door)

Nathan: That was… Interesting…

Guard: I just stick around to get paid.

(Locked-up room)

Chris: Hey! Guys! I'm here, too!

Avery: Great. Just when things were starting to look up.

Chris: I know a way out! They left the construction blueprints on the table I was tied up next to. Typical stupid villain procedure. Now, can someone help me out of this chair?

Madison A.: C'mon… (Rubs cuffs together)…Yes! (They break off and she stands up to help the others) Now if we only had some –

Voice: Keys?

(Everyone turns around to see Jay holding the keys they need)

Avery: Jay! Boy, am I glad to see you! How did you get here?

Jay: Long story… Let's get you out of here. (Takes the cuffs off) Let's go! We don't have much time!

Chris: We have to take the west exit! It's guarded the least!

Jay: No!

Chris: What do you mean, 'no'? They have only three guards on that side!

Jay: They'll be expecting us there! They'll be moving all the troops there to back them up! We have to go the other way!

Chris: Fine! But this had better work!

(Avery sneaks up behind the prison guard and tazers him. He motions to Chris)

Chris: (whisper-yelling) GO!

(Inmates run out)

Warden: The prisoners are escaping!

Avery: Look! The warden is Chef!

Hatchet: Get them! They're heading for the east gate!

(Prison guards run after them. Avery goes down.)

Avery: Noooooo!!!

(The guards swarm him, but some keep on going. Jess goes down.)

Jess: Guys!

Madison; We have to help them!

Chris: There's no time!

(They run out and escape.)

(Back at base)

Chris: Looks like you two mare the last two people… You need to defeat Agent X by planting a time bomb under his base, freeing all the prisoners!

**Next time: The Season Finale!**


	12. Finally! The Season Finale!

Now… after weeks of waiting due to technical difficulty, you can finally see

THE SEASON FINALE

&/&/&/

Chris: You guys are going to get your final tools… Jetpacks! (Holds two jetpacks up)

Jay: Wait, wait, wait… this plot is moving _way_ too fast.

Agent X: Too bad, punk. (Kicks him in the back)

Chris: I have to agree… plot's moving too fast… oh; well… the defeater of Agent X wins a million dollars!

(Chris grabs a jetpack and flies out of harm's way.)

Madison: Figures… (Swings a punch at Agent X, and he falls backwards.)

Chris: That was a little fast… not tense or dramatic at all… I oughta think about changing the name.

(Madison A walks over to Agent X)

Madison: Finally, we can figure out who you are. (Reaches down to take mask off)

(Agent X's legs swing around, knocking Madison down and jumping up.)

Agent X: Psyche! (Throws an octobond at Madison, which locks her limbs in place) I never get tired of that!

Avery: Let her go! (Runs toward him, but Agent X catches him in an octobond, too.)

Agent X: Smooth as silk. (Looks up at Chris) I guess you lost. I've defeated all your agents, Chris.

Chris: Then who's that? (Smiles and points behind Agent X)

Agent X: Who's- (eyes widen) Oh…

(DJ flies in on a jetpack and tackles Agent X)

DJ: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!

(DJ throws him into a wall and turns up, slipping out of the jetpack; the jetpack flies up and explodes. The octobonds fall off.)

Chris: Cool… Okay, name stays…

DJ: (to a stunned Agent X) THAT…WAS FOR BUNNY!

Everyone Else: **WHAT?  
**DJ: Nice try...(Rips off mask)

This fanfiction has been extended for dramatic effect. When you feel ready to find out who Agent X is, please scroll down.

-Laughingstock

….PAUL!

(Everyone else gasps. Chris makes a fake imitation gasp)

Paul (Grinning sheepishly): You got me.

Avery: Explanation, please?

Paul: Long story. Sit down… this is going to be awhile.

(FLASHBACK)

_I thought, hey, I've got better things to do than go back home with a bunch of money. So I join up with Chris and we set up Total Drama Spies. _

_So I'm the evil villain and everything… Then I get the most awesome lucky break ever!_

Madison: Raquel?

Paul: Yeah…

_She joined up with me and helped me capture the lot of you._

Avery: Also…Chris was captured along with the rest of us… then why is he on your side here?

(Cut to rewind)

Chris smiles and pulls out a com link.)

Chris: Agent X?

Agent X: Yes?

Chris: They're away.

Agent X: Excellent. Plan Alpha commencing.

Paul: Where'd you get that?

Madison: It kind of slipped out when the octobonds fell off.

Paul: Yeeaaahhh… that was part of my victory monologue, showing you my ingenious evil plan, blah, blah, blah… Anyways, (turns to an entering Jay) do you want me to tell them or do you want to tell them?

Jay: (sighs) I was dressed up as Chris after we captured him.

Madison: You were working for him the whole time?

(Jay nods)

Chris: Okay… that just about clears everything up! DJ, as our winner, you get to claim the million dollars!

DJ: I've been waiting for this moment… my entire life… (Tears gather in his eyes) …I'll miss you all… (Opens case)-wait… this is only half of the money… where's the other half?

(Car honks outside)

Chef (in Chris's car): I'm going to see the world!

DJ: WAIT!

Chef: Hop in, boy! We're going to Las Vegas!

(DJ jumps in and the car drives off)

Chris: MY CAR! (Falls to the floor and sobs) Well… I'll still have my trusty golf cart…

(Paul and Raquel drive off in his golf cart)

Chris: Oh, COME ON! Now I'll have to WALK to the nearest car dealership! (sighs) Well, see you soon… I've gotta catch my car!


End file.
